Canine Cupids
by mida212
Summary: This isn't how it works. He's just supposed to drive his mom home from the animal shelter with her new puppy, not get adopted himself. Apparently, Charlotte didn't get the memo because she's bound and determined to come home with him. AU
1. Puppy Power

**_Disclaimer: Glee is not mine_**

* * *

**_Ah, canines. Wonderful creatures, those. They're loyal, trusting, kind, and, best of all, really useful for your dating life. Unlike humans, dogs are always willing to run up to someone you're interested in and introduce you. They're clever about it, too: they seem to know that bounding up to someone and wagging their tail is way more effective than an awkward "Hey… see my friend over there?"_**

**_-Unknown_**

* * *

This is _not_ what was supposed to happen.

No, what was supposed to happen was that he'd go with his mom and Kurt to pick up her new dog from the shelter, drop them off at home and hopefully get a hot meal as thanks. But instead, he's standing at the counter filling out adoption papers all because of a damn poodle that decided to adopt him.

His mom had insisted he go into the puppy room with her so he could see the yellow Labrador puppy she'd settled on and decided to name Alan. The yipping had started the moment the shelter worker opened the door and they'd filed in, a bevy of puppies excitedly dancing around their feet. Kurt, ever mindful of his clothes and shoes, had opted to stay outside the door and watch, but he'd happily settled on the floor with the dogs, quickly initiating a game of tug of war with Alan while his mother discussed Alan's food with the shelter worker.

A gentle nudge on his arm had startled him, making him lose the tug of war to Alan, who immediately scampered away, the rope clasped firmly in his mouth. A quick look to his left revealed a small brown poodle to be the nudger, brown eyes looking happily up at him and tail wagging expectantly. He'd smiled at the tiny dog, amused by how the fluffy fur made the dog resemble his old teddy bear, but before he could even reach out to pet the dog, it had climbed into his lap and placed two paws on his chest, tail still going and brown eyes now staring up at him as if to say "_I'm cute and you want me. You know you do."_

His new friend, he'd been informed by the shelter worker, had been born in the shelter a few weeks earlier and unlike her brothers and sisters, never came out to socialize with prospective owners, choosing instead to stay in her cocoon of blankets. Apparently, he was the first person they'd seen the little poodle interact with and while he was happy the puppy had become acclimated to the presence of humans, he wasn't here to adopt a puppy. He was simply the driver so his mom could sit in the back with Alan.

Unfortunately, no one spoke poodle and could inform the little dog of this since no matter where in the puppy room he went, the poodle went too, happily sitting at his feet and wagging her tail, a paw placed carefully on his shoe. The shelter worker, delighted at this turn of events, ran off to get her manager, leaving them alone in the puppy room. Even _Kurt_ had noticed what was going on, opening the door a crack to call out that Finn should adopt the dog that keeps following him.

_"It's a fucking poodle, Kurt," he hissed. "That's a woman's dog."_

_"Kurt's right, baby! You could call her Charlotte!" The matter already settled in her mind, his mom reached out to pet the poodle, who promptly scurried behind Finn's legs, peeking out between his legs to peer at Carole._

_"I'm not calling her Charlotte! It's a poodle," he pointed out again, the little dog seated between his legs, having decided that it might be in her best interest to let Carole pet her. Her little tail swished side to side, hitting his shoes as his mom scratched her ears._

_"Why not? She likes you, don't you Charlotte?" Carole cooed, simultaneously petting the poodle and Alan, who'd wandered back over with his rope. "You could come visit your Uncle Alan at my house."_

_"I'd take Charlotte, Finn. At least it's one female who likes you," Kurt called out, shutting the door before a small ball of black fur could escape._

_"Shut up, Kurt," he hissed. "Why don't you adopt her then?"_

_"Charlotte wants __**you**__ baby, not Kurt," Carole insisted. "Adopt her."_

_"It's a fucking poodle," he repeated weakly, already picturing the mocking he'd be subjected to. "I can't adopt a fucking poodle. Especially one named Charlotte."_

_"Why not?" Kurt's head peeked through the door again. "You two have the same type of hair that can't be controlled. It's clearly meant to be."_

_"It's. A. Fucking. Poodle," he stated again, frowning as Alan decided he also wanted to sit between Finn's legs, which meant the poodle was about to be steamrolled. Afraid for her, he reached down and scooped her up, the poodle promptly licking his face as thanks before she snuggled into his arms with a yawn._

_"See! Charlotte wants you to adopt her!" Carole insisted as she picked up Alan and cuddled him to her chest, just as the shelter worker came back in with her manager, who promptly squealed when she saw the sleeping poodle in his arms. "Kurt's right. It's meant to be."_

Evidently, his kickass "_it's a fucking poodle_" argument held no water, since almost before he knew it, the manager had whisked out the papers and began explaining the adoption process to him, the tiny dog still asleep in his arms.

"Now, we'll call your references today and if all goes well, you can pick her up tomorrow after she has her shot," the manager explains. "Any ideas of what you want to call her?"

"Charlotte," Carole answers for him, nodding in satisfaction as the manager writes the name on the adoption papers. "Her name is Charlotte."

Charlotte whimpers and tries to get back to him when he hands her over to the manager and he's still a little shell shocked later at the pet store as he's picking out supplies for Charlotte with his mom, while Kurt stresses over collar choices for both Alan and Charlotte. It finally hits him what he's done when Kurt proudly shows him the ID tags he's made for the puppies over at the engraver machine, a New York Jets themed one in the shape of a biscuit for Alan while Charlotte's is heart shaped and edged by pink rhinestones. While Alan's name is written in masculine block letters, Kurt's chosen to have the name _Charlotte_ engraved in elegant script in the middle of the heart just above his phone number. Her name sitting above his phone number makes him pause.

Holy shit. He's adopted a dog.

He's adopted a dog, which means she's going to be totally dependent on him for everything and he's responsible now for someone other than himself. Still, it's a dog and dogs are pretty kickass. He can totally teach Charlotte to do all sorts of awesome things and he kind of figures that she can eat the stuff he drops on the floor, which means he won't have to vacuum his apartment anymore. The thought makes him grin and he just _knows_ this is going to be awesome. It's a dog, how could it not be?

Even if it is a fucking poodle.

* * *

She doesn't expect New York to be so…_lonely._

It's not like she expected to take Broadway by storm (although super deep down she did), but she'd at least expected to make some friends to supplement the few friends she'd left behind in Ohio. And yet it's been a month and her new friend count is _zero_. Four Fridays of sitting on the couch watching _Say Yes to the Dress,_ followed by four Saturdays of whatever she felt like watching on Netflix, her puppy on the couch next to her. Which brings her to her other problem.

Pongo needs a friend.

She's been worried about the Dalmatian puppy ever since she'd brought him home, afraid that he was just as lonely as she was. He'd been a gift from her fathers, who'd determined that she needed protection if she was going to insist on moving to New York and not live with them in Ohio. They'd specifically chosen the breed for both practical and sentimental reasons, knowing the Dalmatian's reputation for being both a fire dog and a rescue dog as well as the fact that Rachel had always loved the Disney movie _101 Dalmatians _when she was little.

She'd been excited to go to the breeder once they'd arrived in New York, playing with all the puppies and finally deciding on a male with black spots emerging all over his body except for his face. She liked the fact that his face remained pure white while his ears and body were polka dotted; deciding it gave him character and she'd immediately christened him Pongo after the dog from _101 Dalmatians_.

Her dads had stayed with her while she and Pongo became acclimated to both each other and their new townhouse, but all too soon it was just them, alone in a new city. Technically, they were actually just outside the city, nestled away in a small town up in Westchester and while she'd been annoyed at first at her fathers for insisting that the townhouse they would be paying for be in a safe town of their choosing, she was glad for Pongo's sake that he actually had grass to play on rather than the concrete streets of Manhattan.

She'd taken careful note of the residents coming and going from the townhouses surrounding hers as she'd walked Pongo outside to his designated bathroom tree each time, hoping to see some potential friends for Pongo and herself (and maybe a boyfriend) but so far, she'd been sadly disappointed.

The guy who liked to run shirtless throughout the complex had possible boyfriend potential and she'd worn her best casual but still sexy outfits the next few times she'd walked Pongo, giving a tentative wave as he'd jogged by. Brody had jogged to a stop after her third attempt and she'd flirted shamelessly each subsequent walk until she'd seen him talking to an older woman who looked like she wanted to devour him right there and he didn't seem to put off by it, actually following the woman into her townhouse. He might not have been put off by it, but she certainly was, altering Pongo's bathroom schedule to avoid Brody's jogs.

Other than Brody, things around the Laurel Hollow Townhouse Complex weren't looking too promising which was why she'd finally resorted to calling the breeder, worried that Pongo was missing out on making friends. Will had been less than helpful, assuring her that Pongo would be fine and that it would all work out. Not satisfied by that answer, she resumes her walks, continuing to scope out the canine and human scene around the complex.

This new bathroom schedule courtesy of Brody has them out much earlier in the morning and it's on her third day of the new schedule when she actually sees a dog and his owner. She's a little frightened at first, since it's 6AM, still dark out and both the dog and his owner are _huge_, but she relaxes a little once they get closer and she sees a tennis ball clamped in the Bull Mastiff's mouth. They walk under a streetlight, allowing Rachel to see that his owner is actually a large masculine woman that she's noticed walking to the next building over a few times.

Still nervous, she glances down at Pongo, but as usual, he's more interested in the snazzy red leash she'd bought to match his red collar, rolling onto his back as he holds the leash in his mouth. The puppy jerks his head back and forth as he plays with the leash in his mouth making the leash tangle around his legs and effectively hog tying himself.

"Pongo, _no_!" she hisses, her chances at a quick escape eviscerated by him tangling himself. She tugs at the leash, hoping it'll miraculously untangle but Pongo seems to think she's playing a game, jerking his head back to keep the leash tangled. "_Pongo_!"

"You know, if you want the dog to listen, you really need to use a more authoritative voice."

She turns at the deep voice, surprised to see the Bull Mastiff and his owner standing in the street right next to the grassy patch she and Pongo are sharing. "I'm sorry?"

"Your voice. It sounds too friendly, so he thinks you're playing," the woman explains, doing some sort of hand motion in front of her dog, who immediately sits.

"Oh." She flushes; worried this woman might not think she's a responsible pet owner, especially since Pongo is _still _tangled in his leash while the Bull Mastiff is sitting calmly next to his owner, the tennis ball still clamped firmly in his mouth. "I'm new at this. Actually, I'm new here."

"I can tell. I've seen you two out here, although never this early." She bends down, her voice reassuring as she reaches a hand out to Pongo. The puppy immediately stops playing with his leash to sniff her hand. "I'm Shannon. Shannon Beiste. And this here is Wayne. I think we live in the next building over from you."

"Rachel Berry." She watches quietly as Shannon pets Pongo a few times before attempting to untangle the puppy. "And this is Pongo."

"How ya doing, Pongo?" Shannon asks, patting his head as she works on the last of the tangles. Freed, Pongo immediately jumps up against Shannon a few times.

"_Pongo_! We don't jump!" Rachel cries only to have Pongo ignore her, as he bounces around his new friends. "I'm so sorry Shannon."

"Not a problem. You should have seen Wayne when I first got him." She jerks her thumb towards Wayne, who's still sitting in the same spot, watching Pongo lower himself onto his front paws, his tail wagging happily as he tries to get Wayne to play. "He was a maniac. Running all over the place and only stopping when I played Wayne Newton music. That's how he got his name."

She laughs at that. "Really? He's a Wayneniac?"

"Huge. _Danke Schoen _would stop him in his tracks," Shannon replies fondly, giving Wayne a head rub. "I even got Wayne Newton to autograph his collar last year."

"So you're saying I should find out who Pongo's favorite artist is and he'll calm down?" The thought strikes her that she's clearly eliminated, since Pongo's heard her sing many times and never had a reaction, which makes her frown. "He does like that Dalmatian Plantation song from _101 Dalmatians_, but I'm not sure who sings that."

"Oh no. You'll need to do a lot more than that," Shannon predicts, watching a yipping Pongo bounce around Wayne. "I bet Pongo will calm in no time."

Rachel highly doubts this, but not about to argue with a potential friend, she pastes a smile on her face. "What did you do?"

"Obedience school." She eyes Pongo thoughtfully. "You know, there's a class down at the local dog park. Meets every Saturday."

"Oh?" The idea excites her, simply because a class means other dogs for Pongo and more importantly other _people_, hopefully of the young variety.

"I teach the beginner class with Wayne here but there's a puppy class you could enroll in." She pats Pongo on the head once more. "It's called puppy pre-school."

"Where do I sign up?" Rachel demands, too excited about the possibility of meeting people to chastise Pongo for jumping up on Shannon again. "Are there a lot of people in the class?"

To her disappointment, Shannon shakes her head. "Puppy preschool has eight dogs max. Sue doesn't allow more than that."

"Oh." She supposes she should just take what she can get but part of her hopes the seven other dogs in the class are accompanied by seven cute boys. "So how do I sign up? Do I just show up at the park?"

Shannon snorts. "Sue would _hate_ that. Tell you what. Wayne and I will stop by after football practice today and get you all set up."

"_Really_?" Her mind is already running wild with ideas for being a good hostess, ranging from possible recipes she could make to checking her iPod to see if she owned any Wayne Newton songs and she can barely keep the excitement out of her voice. "You're going to come over?"

"Sure." She gives Pongo a final pat. "Football practice finishes around five, so I can probably come over about 5:30, if that's ok."

"That's fine," she replies quickly, thinking it really didn't matter what time Shannon came over since it's not like she had a job or friends or anything that might take up her time. "We're right over there in Building 3, number 104."

"Well alright then. Wayne and I will see you later." She does some sort of hand movement again and Wayne stands this time, ignoring Pongo yipping at him as he starts to walk calmly next to Shannon.

"Bye!" she calls out excitedly, tugging Pongo's leash so he'll follow her back to their apartment. Pongo has other ideas, immediately heading off to the left via the space between Rachel's legs to check out a rock. She sighs, stepping over the leash. "Come on, Pongo. We have to get ready to host our new friends."

The thought makes her grin and she spends the rest of the day cleaning and cooking, so that by the time Shannon is due to arrive, she's baked three different types of cookies, created a vegetable platter, ran out to the supermarket for a variety of beverages and even made homemade biscuits for Pongo and Wayne.

Shannon and Wayne arrive as promised at 5:30 and she's not sure who's more excited, her or Pongo. She kind of figures Pongo is, since he promptly pees from excitement on Shannon's shoe.

"_Pongo_! We don't go peepee on our friends!" Rachel cries in horror while the puppy looks back at her and gives a large yawn as he finishes. Unlike Rachel, he's clearly not embarrassed since he begins to paw at Shannon's shoe laces, his tail wagging happily. "I'm so sorry Shannon."

"Nothing I haven't had happen before." Shannon waves her off as she bends down to Pongo's level. "Looks to me like this little guy is ready for pre-school."

"We really are working on potty training," Rachel stresses. "I don't know why he did that. He usually just uses the pad."

Shannon shrugs, pulling off her shoe and placing it outside Rachel's door. "It happens. They'll go over all that in puppy pre-school."

"Oh." Relieved that Shannon's not mad, she picks up a bouncing Pongo and carries him into the kitchen, Shannon and Wayne following. She waits until Shannon's settled at the table with Wayne at her feet before she gestures to her kitchen island which she'd loaded down with all the cookies and the vegetable platter as well as the various beverages. "Help yourself. This tray right here is for Wayne and Pongo, though. I'd normally put this out on the coffee table in the living room but Pongo likes to shoplift."

Shannon laughs, reaching for a cookie. "Did you really make homemade biscuits?"

She nods, slightly embarrassed. "I saw the recipe in _Everyday with Rachael Ray_ magazine. And well, since I'm currently unemployed, I thought I'd try it. There were more but Pongo stole them."

Shannon laughs again, holding a biscuit out to Wayne, who immediately sits. "Well, that'll stop once he goes to pre-school."

"Really?" she asks, relieved at the thought since she's lost a lot of food this way. "So tell me more about pre-school."

"You're in luck. There's a new class starting this Saturday." Shannon immediately launches into a full description of the class and she grows more excited with each detail, particularly when Shannon actually demonstrates what they'll learn and gets Pongo to sit, something she'd been practicing to no avail.

They end up staying for dinner and by the end of it, Shannon's promised to introduce her to the music teacher at the high school she works at, claiming Will's always looking for a vocal coach to help with the glee club. It's not Broadway but she'll take it since it's not like she's got anything else going on. Shannon's even promised to bring her and Pongo to pre-school on Saturday, the thought of which excites her since she won't look like a loser showing up by herself.

She manages to wait until the door closes behind Shannon and Wayne before she squeals, hugging Pongo to her chest in excitement. "We made two friends!"

Pongo licks her face to show his excitement and she places a big kiss on his head as she walks to the bedroom, her mind whirling. It's only Tuesday and she's already wondering how long she needs to wait before she can call Shannon to invite her and Wayne over for movie musical night. She decides to play it cool and wait until she sees them on Saturday but that doesn't stop her from running through a potential list of movies in her head as well as snacks to make. She's only been in New York for a month but she can already tell Saturday is going to be the best day she's had in New York.

She can't wait.

* * *

_**A/N: So yeah. I still can't quite wrap my head around what's happened and while I most likely won't be watching Glee depending on the direction they take, Finn was Cory, but Cory wasn't Finn which means I can compartmentalize and keep writing. In my mind, I feel that the character needs to live on and that fact that my stories are all AU makes it easier to do that. I think Cory would want Finn to live on in all forms, so I intend to do that.**_

_**Also, the poll was SUPER SUPER close and I just had this in my head probably because I'm currently in Obedience School with my own puppy, although we're in the Kindergarten class. So what I decided to do was post the first parts of both this story and My Eyes Adored You today (look for it later tonight). I guess I'm just incapable of writing a one shot, since this one is already over 13,000 words.**_

_**Finn with a poodle just makes me laugh and his "it's a fucking poodle" argument is actually based off an old coworker of mine who had me in hysterics on the subway one day after work telling me the story of how he went to the pet store for a ferret and came out with a poodle. "I'm telling you, Michelle. I kept going 'it's a fucking poodle! I can't get a poodle! I'm a man!"**_

_**And yes, I'm aware of how long it's been for COAST.**_


	2. You've Got A Friend In Me

**_Disclaimer: Glee is not mine._**

* * *

**_Dogs have a way of finding the people who need them, and filling an emptiness we didn't ever know we had._**

**_-Thom Jones_**

* * *

Charlotte's all kinds of awesome.

True, he's only had her for like a month, but she's totally earning her keep around the apartment he shares with Artie. Charlotte had been _so_ excited to see him when he'd returned to the shelter the next day to pick her up, scampering right over to him and while Artie had been less than thrilled at first about Finn getting adopted, Finn's since caught Charlotte joyriding more than once on the lap of his best friend as he pushes his wheelchair around the apartment.

As he'd predicted, she's killer at cleaning up food dropped on the floor and she clearly likes sports, choosing to lie on the couch with him while he watches the game. And it's kind of nice having her cuddled in bed with him, even if she's supposed to be sleeping on that expensive bed he'd bought her for inside her cage (she'd totally mastered potty training after like 4 days which they think might be a Guinness record; Artie's looking into it). The expensive princess bed was regulated to the living room the second she gave him the sad puppy look and she's been in his bed ever since, opting to take her afternoon nap in Artie's bed on the days she doesn't go to his mom's house to play with Alan while he's at work.

Alan's a little crazy but he and Charlotte are like best friends so he figures it's good she goes over there to play although he could do without Kurt using Charlotte as a model for his (still in development) line of dog wear. He'd arrived at his mom's house last week to find Charlotte dressed in a polka-dotted doggie raincoat and matching rain hat, watching from the couch as Kurt tried to wrestle Alan into a larger size. Unlike Charlotte, the Labrador had wanted nothing to do with the rain gear, showing his displeasure by eating his hat.

While he and their parents had found it funny, Kurt had been furious at his only large breed prototype being eaten, claiming his menswear line would no longer be named for Alan and became even more irate when Alan pulled Charlotte's hat off her head and began to chew that one too. Alan had been banned from modeling outdoor wear, regulated to holiday sweaters and polos while Charlotte modeled everything else and the fact that Charlotte was such a kickass model only cemented his belief that she was awesome.

Her awesomeness extends to his dating life too since he kind of thinks Charlotte's groomer has a thing for him. He'd noticed that Marley threw in a lot of extra stuff for Charlotte when he dropped her off for her first grooming, even offering a free bath and fluff for the next time but just assumed that was because Charlotte didn't bite her or like pee on her. It wasn't until he'd mentioned to Artie how Marley had even given Charlotte hair bows and shined her nails that the idea of Marley being interested occurred to him, which just makes him kick himself for not recognizing the signals earlier. He's not that interested in Marley but she's still a girl so he kind of figures he should see this through if only for the possibility of finally understanding the girl code and if he has a chance of getting some, great (cause it's been a while. Seriously).

Signals aside, he's not _entirely_ sure that Marley's into him which is why he's convinced Kurt to bring Alan in for a nail clipping when he brings Charlotte in for her bath. Kurt like _lives_ for that Bachelor show so he figures he'd be able to read Marley and tell him if she's into him or just being nice.

"How do you not know if she likes you or not? Knock it off Alan!" Kurt asks as Finn drives, gently pushing the Labrador who's popped up between their seats, his front paws on the console as he licks Kurt's ear. "It's not rocket science."

"Girls are complicated, ok? Just help me out." He pulls into the parking lot of Pawfection and parks, checking his reflection in the mirror as Alan noses him and licks his face. "Grab Al, will you?"

Alan's running from window to window, excited by the prospect of someplace new and it's all Kurt can do to keep the Labrador from escaping as he opens the back door. Hoping Charlotte's not too mad at him for leaving her, he climbs out and follows Kurt struggling with a wiggly Alan into the store.

Marley's behind the counter grooming a Schnauzer and her face lights up when she sees him. Kurt throws him a look that he _knows_ means he's wondering how Finn could possibly be confused but her excitement could simply be for the fact that she'd got to hang out with like the world's most awesome dog all morning.

"Finn!" She smiles, putting down her scissors. "Charlotte's been waiting for you."

"Where is she?" He smiles back, looking for any evidence of the poodle.

"Let me just finish with Nigel here and I'll get her," she promises, picking up her scissors again. "Who's the cutie next to you?"

"I'm Kurt, Finn's brother," Kurt replies, turning his face to avoid the tongue Alan is trying to place against his mouth.

"She means Alan not you," Finn snaps. His tone gets much nicer as he turns back to Marley. "Alan is my mom's dog so he's like Charlotte's uncle."

She giggles as she pockets the scissors. "I see. And what brings Uncle Alan to Pawfection?"

"Alan just needs his nails done." Kurt shifts the puppy in his arms. "I tried to give him a full mani-pedi when I did my own but all he did was eat the toe spacers and drink the water in my foot bath."

Finn snickers. "Can't blame him for that."

"Well let me put Nigel away and get Charlotte then I'll do Alan's nails," Marley decides, picking Nigel up off the table. "Be right back."

Kurt manages to wait until Marley's disappeared into the back before he speaks. "You seriously weren't sure if she was into you?"

"You think she is?"

"Positive." He nods firmly. "That's like asking if you dress bad."

"Shut it," Finn hisses as the door starts to open again.

"Here she is!" Marley announces as she comes back in, a bathed, trimmed and fluffed Charlotte in her arms.

"There's my girl!" He grins, knowing the exact moment Charlotte's spotted him, since she starts struggling in Marley's arms to get to him. Beside him, Alan's doing the same in Kurt's arms, clearly having noticed his best friend.

"She had a full morning of beauty," Marley replies, handing her over and smiling as Charlotte settles happily in Finn's arms. "She got the works: Bathed, trimmed, fluffed and shined. I even used a special fruit shampoo on her so she should smell like berries."

"I like her hair bows," Kurt comments, holding Alan out to smell Charlotte. He eyes the pink tulle flowers now gracing each of Charlotte's ears. "Do you have an in house designer?"

"_Kurt_," Finn warns, correctly guessing that the designer in Kurt was mentally creating hair bow samples in his head to show Marley.

"What? I was simply asking a question. I can't help it if I'm interested in Charlotte's apparel."

"Yeah, that's it," he grumbles, already knowing that Charlotte's collection of hair bows was about to quadruple in size. He turns his attention to Charlotte, holding her out for inspection. The poodle's little tail wags happily as he inspects, making him laugh. "You look good, Char."

"You like it?" Marley asks anxiously. "I debated between the berry shampoo or the mango one because I didn't know which you'd like better."

He shrugs, tucking Charlotte back close to him and trying to figure out his next move. "Well I like how this one smells so I guess I'm a berry kind of guy."

"Whatever you pick would be an improvement since Charlotte smelled like crap," Kurt adds helpfully, still struggling with Alan in his arms. "Must be what happens when you live with two single guys."

His brother's a _genius_.

Marley's eyes go wide as she processes this. "Two single guys, huh?"

Kurt nods, placing Alan on the floor. "Like _super_ single. I can't remember the last time either of them had a girl."

His brother's an _ass_.

He takes a page from Charlotte's book and places his foot on top of Kurt's, pressing down forcefully to keep Kurt from saying anything else.

Fortunately Alan comes to his rescue, having discovered a barrel of squeaky toys nearby. The two front paws he has on the edge of the barrel as he peruses causes the barrel to tip and spill squeaky toys everywhere. Alan is thrilled, grabbing a squeaky elephant and immediately rolling onto his back against Kurt's legs as he plays with the elephant.

"_Alan_! We don't shoplift! That jungle elephant doesn't even match the decor of your other toys!" Kurt cries above the squeaking. Alan ignores him, letting the elephant fall out of his mouth and onto the floor before he pounces again. The squeaking has gotten Charlotte's attention and she wiggles in Finn's arms, determined to join Alan. Not stopping until Finn has placed her on the floor, she happily grabs a squeaky monkey and settles at Finn's feet, the monkey squeaking his protests against his shoe as she plays. Embarrassed at Alan's behavior, Kurt places a hand on his hip as he surveys the scene at his feet. "Now look what you've done! You've turned Charlotte onto a life of crime!"

"It's not a problem. They can have those toys," Marley breathes, her eyes on Finn.

"We'll pay for them," Finn insists, ignoring Kurt's stare. "Bonnie and Clyde down there shouldn't get away with their crime."

"Oh it's fine." She pushes her hair back. "Um...maybe you could buy me a cup of coffee instead."

"Sure. How do you like it? I could go get it now," he offers. "That way you could drink it between dogs."

"Oh well um I can't really drink because the dogs will knock it over but um maybe the next time you get coffee we could get it together," Marley stammers.

"I don't drink coffee," Finn replies stupidly. He flushes at the look Kurt gives him. "But I think they have other stuff."

"They do." She smiles at him. "So I can have coffee and you can have other stuff."

"So when are you having coffee and other stuff?" Kurt demands. "Finn's free tonight."

"Kurt!" he hisses, too embarrassed to look at Marley.

"What? You are," Kurt reasons. "Shall we say 6?"

She shakes her head. "I'm working till seven."

"Eight then," Kurt decides. "That'll give us time to plan his outfit."

"_Kurt_!" he cries again. He glances down at Alan, pleased to see that unbeknownst to Kurt, Alan has temporarily abandoned his squeaky elephant in favor of Kurt's shoelaces. "You're not planning my outfit! Knock it off!"

"What? You can't possibly expect to wear jeans." He turns back to Marley. "Starbucks on the corner ok?"

"It's fine," Marley replies quickly, moving around the counter.

Charlotte, on high alert, immediately grabs her monkey and scurries behind Finn while an unsuspecting Alan begins to squeak away on his back once more, this time with a squeaky hippo.

Marley crouches next to Alan, petting him reassuringly. Alan immediately stops his squeaking to do a complete inspection of Marley, his nose working overtime to process all the different smells on her. "Good boy Alan."

"So about this coffee date," Kurt continues, handing Marley his end of Alan's leash as she picks the puppy up. "What will you be wearing?"

"Kurt!" Finn cries, beyond embarrassed and wondering why he'd ever thought it would be a good idea to bring him. "Knock it off!"

"What? I just want to make sure you match in terms of casualness. I don't want to put you in a suit if she wears her work clothes."

Marley blushes as she places Alan on the table and puts the safety harness around him. She stares down at Alan's paw, concentrating on cutting his nails even as Alan attempts to kiss her face.

"Alan beat you to it," Kurt whispers with a snicker.

"Alan ate your shoelace," he shoots back, grinning smugly when Kurt gives a cry of surprise as he looks down at his beloved designer boots. He immediately bends down to survey the damage, leaving Finn to smirk and secretly watch Marley, who's moved onto a different paw as she talks to Alan about what she's doing. Alan seems interested, his head cocked to one side as he listens to her discuss her rationale for why she's going to cut his nails first before she dremels them and the sight makes Finn laugh.

Marley may have been the one to initiate and ask him out, but now that they have an actual date set up he's actually excited. Considering that his only plans for tonight were video games with Artie, coffee with a girl sounds a lot better.

Even if he's still not that interested in her.

* * *

Puppy Pre-school was _not_ a good idea.

Granted, it's only been a few minutes but she's already tempted to march back home. It had started out well, Shannon giving her a run down of what to expect as they'd walked with Wayne and Pongo to the park (even if she did end up having to carry Pongo because he kept running under Wayne's legs), but once they'd arrived at the park things had gone downhill.

To start with, they were the last to arrive which meant that Pongo had a lot of butt sniffing to catch up on. He'd dragged her over to a young Asian couple with a boxer puppy named George and promptly got the leashes tangled in his quest to sniff. She'd barely gotten the leashes untangled and introduced herself before Pongo dragged her over to a blonde couple named Sam and Quinn with what looked like a spaniel puppy who wanted no part of Pongo. Undaunted, Pongo had simply bounced over to the next dog, tangling his leash around his Mohawked owner's legs. She'd sighed, introduced herself to the Mohawked man and who she assumed was his wife and proceeded to untangle the leash, only to have Pongo bounce over to Wayne, who appeared to be waiting for Shannon to finish talking to a tall blonde woman holding the leash of a German Shepherd.

Not wanting Pongo to be labeled as the annoying dog in class that nobody likes, she pulls him away from Wayne, trying to figure out where to stand since she's already noticed a major problem with the class.

She's the only single one in class.

Everyone's paired off with their significant other and annoyed by the fact that her dream of being in a class with all single men has been shattered so quickly, she tugs Pongo over to stand next to an older couple with a yellow Labrador puppy. The Labrador seems to be just as energetic as Pongo since he actually beats Pongo to the butt sniffing and leash tangling.

"Alan! _No_!" the woman cries, dropping the leash to begin the process of untangling, a feat not made easy since both dogs are spinning in circles.

Rachel laughs, relieved that Pongo's not the only crazy dog in the class. "It's ok. They're just excited."

"Still." She manages to get the leashes untangled only to have the two puppies begin play fighting at her feet. "Alan!"

"Is that dog ever not a maniac?" the man next to her demands, shaking his head.

Rachel stares at him in surprise, hoping he doesn't mean Pongo. "He's not-"

"My husband means Alan." She laughs, watching the dogs at her feet. "At least they get along. I'm Carole by the way."

"Burt," her husband adds. He nods to the Labrador, busy playing with Pongo. "That nut job down there is Alan."

"I'm Rachel." She points to the Dalmatian currently on his back as Alan playfully bites his neck. "That's Pongo."

"Oh, like the movie?" Carole laughs again. "My son loved that movie when he was young."

She perks up at the word _son_, her mind immediately wanting specifics. "I always did too."

"Carole, I need to go. There's an emergency down at the tire shop," Burt announces, glancing at his phone with a frown. "I'll text the boys and get one of them to come get you."

"OK." She frowns, tugging on Alan's leash. "You're going to miss a lot though."

"You can fill me in later." He presses a kiss to her cheek and hurries off.

Carole rolls her eyes. "Men. I guarantee you he's going to watch some sporting event at the tire shop."

Burt's use of the word _boys_ not lost on her, Rachel giggles just as Shannon comes over, Wayne in tow.

"I'm going to start my class, Rachel. Sue's about to start and if I were you, I'd separate those two," Shannon whispers, nodding to Alan and Pongo still play fighting between Rachel and Carole. "Otherwise she'll put you in time-out before the class even starts."

Rachel gulps as Shannon nods to an area nearby cordoned off with traffic cones and quickly moves to separate Pongo, Carole doing the same with Alan. Satisfied, Shannon gives both dogs a head rub before heading over to teach her own class.

"That's my friend Shannon and her dog Wayne," Rachel announces proudly. "Wayne's a Wayneiac, you know."

Carole laughs. "I am too. My sons make fun of me all the time for liking him."

Again, her mind goes into overdrive, intrigued by sons plural but before she can get specifics, the blonde woman she'd seen Shannon talking to puts a bullhorn to her lips.

"Alright, you puppies, listen up!" she booms into the bullhorn as she paces in front of the class, the German Shepherd sitting at attention nearby. "I'm Sue Sylvester and this here…" she points to the German Shepherd. "…is Fräulein Helga. Welcome to pre-school or as I like to call it, _hell_. Say goodbye to peeing on the carpet and chewing slippers because from this point on, you're in boot camp."

Nervous, Rachel glances down at Pongo, who appears unworried since he's currently on his back fighting his leash. Just like when they'd met Shannon, he's somehow managed to get his legs tangled, once again hog tying himself. She tugs on the leash discreetly, hoping he'll stop before Sue notices, but the movement only makes Pongo fight his leash more.

Pongo's not the only puppy unworried, since a quick glance down the line shows Alan to be cleaning himself, while the snooty Spaniel is barking at the boxer and the Mohawked man's dog is chasing his tail.

"Becky! My attendance list!" She pulls out her glasses to consult the clipboard handed to her by a short blonde girl dressed in an identical track suit. "Max!"

The Mohawked man raises his hand. "Here but I'm Puck and this is my girlfriend Kitty."

"Don't care." She consults her clipboard again. "Alan!"

"Here." Carole smiled, raising her hand. "I'm Carole."

Sue sighs, pulling off her glasses for a moment. "Do I _really_ need to explain that from this point on you will be known by your puppy name? If you've come with a partner, you will be known as Alan#1 and Alan#2. Got that?" The group stays silent and satisfied, Sue puts on her glasses to continue. "Chloe!"

The blond man with the big mouth raises his hand, exchanging nervous glasses with his blonde wife. "Uh, here."

"LeFou!" She frowns as the name is read off and is greeted by silence. "LeFou!"

Rachel peers down the line, wondering which dog is LeFou, but nobody's raising their hand. Nervous, she glances back at Sue, who's still frowning.

"This better not be the same LeFou from last time!" Sue barks to her assistant, her frown growing deeper when Becky nods. "Are you kidding me? He should be Beiste's problem now not mine!"

"Sorry, Coach. You know he flunked," Becky replies.

"Puppies take note!" Sue demands into her bullhorn, not one puppy paying attention to her. "LeFou is what we call a perpetual preschooler. I see you in this class more than once and I will make your life so miserable you'll be wishing you were back in cages at the shelter. Moving on. George!"

"Here." The Asian couple raises their hands nervously, not lowering them till Sue nods.

"Named after boxing legend George Forman, I presume?" Sue queries in a rare moment of interest. She waits till they nod before continuing. "Can't stand him. Prepare to be mercilessly mocked, Asians."

Rachel squirms, hoping Sue likes the movie _101 Dalmatians_, since she's assuming she'll be the next one called. Sure enough, Sue turns toward her, eyeing Pongo thoughtfully. "This must be Pongo. How original."

"It's cute," she defends. "A Disney classic."

Ignoring her, Sue continues her pacing, pausing in front of the barking Spaniel. "You. Time-Out. Now."

The blond man's mouth drops open. "Seriously? Chloe's just barking."

"Had you taken the time to read the binder you'd received upon registration, you'd know that barking is strictly prohibited in my class. First bark and you're in time out." She points to the cordoned off area, not putting her arm down until Sam drags Chloe over. "Stay in there till she stops barking then get back in line."

Rachel gulps as Sue continues her inspection, heading her way. Pongo's still fighting his leash at her feet and she's even more nervous since Shannon had never mentioned any binder. Chloe's stopped barking so Sam's brought her back in line, which means the time out box is available and she _really _doesn't want to be in time-out.

Fortunately, Sue's distracted by the fact that George the boxer has decided to go to the bathroom and she manages to untie Pongo before Sue can say anything since she's too busy yelling at his owners Mike and Tina.

"She's intense, isn't she?" Carole whispers, holding the leash tightly to keep Alan from wandering over to the dog on her other side.

Rachel nods, afraid to answer since Sue's just announced that they're going to start on the first command. She watches intently as Sue and the Fräulein demonstrate 'sit', hoping Pongo's in the mood to cooperate. Luckily, Shannon had advised her to bring a bag of treats and it turns out that Pongo's more than willing to work for food. Alan soon sees what's going on next to him and wanders over to sit for a treat, making her laugh as she gives him one.

"You can have some if you want," Rachel offers, holding out her bag of homemade dog biscuits. "I made way too many and Alan seems to like them."

"He doesn't seem to like the treats I have," Carole agrees, taking a few biscuits. "You made these?"

She nods, about to explain about her lack of a job when Sue appears and demands to see Pongo in action. Pongo rises to the occasion, expertly sitting like a pro to her relief, allowing Sue to move on to Alan.

They're not so lucky later when practicing the look command, since Pongo decides he'd rather pee on Sue than look at Rachel which earns them a trip to time-out. She's horrified, becoming even more horrified when Pongo decides to eat one of the traffic cones, earning them a longer sentence. Sue allows them to exit time-out just as the class is winding down and she takes her place next to Carole and Alan again, hoping Pongo will have a chance to redeem himself.

Carole, she notes with interest, has been joined by a young man about her own age. She eyes him, immediately eliminating any romantic thoughts since its obvious she's not his type. Still, its someone in her age bracket, so she immediately becomes excited.

"Oh, good, Rachel. You're out of time-out," Carole announces happily, gesturing to the man next to her. "I want you to meet my younger son Kurt."

"Hi, I'm Rachel," she bubbles, pointing down to where Pongo and Alan have resumed their play fighting, making Kurt look less than thrilled since they've chosen to play fight against his legs, no doubt leaving fur on his expensive looking outfit. "That's my dog, Pongo."

"Pongo, huh?" He laughs, exchanging a look with Carole.

"I thought you'd find that funny," Carole responds. "You always did love that movie."

"What's not to love? It's a movie about fashion," Kurt replies. "_Some_ people might think that the way the dogs communicate is _k__ick ass_, but the fact that it's about fashion is what makes it kick ass."

"Kurt. Don't start that argument again," Carole warns.

She's about to ask them to elaborate when Sue makes the announcement that class is over and that next week they need to make sure to bring another person with them to class. The idea of having to bring someone else to class worries her and she bites her lip in contemplation.

"Are you ok, Rachel?" Carole asks worriedly.

"I um...don't have anyone to bring to class with me," she admits quietly, a blush on her face. "I just moved here from Ohio. Pongo's my only friend."

"Kurt will be your partner," Carole decides immediately. "It's perfect since my husband will be my partner."

"Oh I couldn't ask him to do that," she stammers.

"He doesn't mind," Carole insists. "Right Kurt?"

"It's totally fine," Kurt adds, glancing down at the dogs still playing at his feet.

She kind of thinks Kurt's not too thrilled at the fact that his mother just volunteered him but she's not about to press the issue since Kurt could be a new friend. "Well if you're sure."

"Positive." Carole nods firmly. "What made you move here?"

"I want to be on Broadway," she announces proudly.

Kurt has a sudden change in demeanor, his face lighting up. "Broadway?"

"Oh boy. You've found your soul mate, Rachel. Kurt loves Broadway," Carole teases. "He'll talk your ear off."

"Have you seen _Kinky Boots_ yet?" he demands. "I'm dying to."

She shakes her head. "The only one I've seen was _The Lion King_ when I first moved here and that was with my dads. I haven't had anyone to go with since they went back to Ohio."

"I've seen that one seven times," Kurt replies excitedly. "It was good."

"Can I ask you a question?" Rachel hesitates, waiting until they nod yes. "I was going to try and find a sushi place and watch musicals all night but um I don't know any good restaurants."

"That's not a fun Saturday all alone! Why don't you two come over for dinner?" Carole decides. "Pongo and Alan can play and Kurt can talk Broadway with you."

"Are you sure?" she asks, trying not to show how thrilled she is at the prospect of eating with other people after a month of eating by herself.

"Positive. We'd love to have you two," Carole assures her, Kurt nodding beside her.

"Well if you're sure," she says slowly, already mentally planning what to bring.

"We are," Carole says firmly.

"Give me your number," Kurt demands. "We need to cross reference our movie inventory so you know which to bring for tonight."

"Pongo and I live right over there. You could see for yourself. I mean, if you want to." She bites her lip nervously as she point to her complex that borders the far side of park.

Kurt shrugs, handing his mother his car keys. "Sure. Mom can drive my car home and I'll get a ride with you later."

"Really?" She's practically bouncing in place at the thought of two legged company.

"Sure, let's go." He turns to his mother. "I'll see you later."

"You two have fun." She leans down to give Pongo a head rub. "Dinner's at 6:30."

"Got it. I'll make a salad and something for dessert," Rachel decides, her brain running through recipes.

"Let's go, Rachel." She barely has time to say goodbye to Carole and Alan before Kurt's leading her off. The walk is short and they chatter about the latest Broadway gossip, punctuated by Pongo bouncing around them as he explores.

"You live _here_?" Kurt asks in amazement as she unlocks her front door. He follows her into the foyer, mouth agape at the large gourmet kitchen to his right and the impressive staircase in front of him. "Alone?"

She blushes, unhooking Pongo's leash, who immediately scampers off down the hall to the great room. "My fathers bought it for me."

"You must be an only child," he comments as he follows her into the open kitchen and sits at the granite island while she opens the fridge.

"I am." She holds up a bottle of water in silent invitation, placing it in front of him when he nods. "Let's go check out my movies."

He follows her into the great room where Pongo is currently sound asleep in a cage designed to look like an end table and makes a beeline for her DVDs. "Hmmm. We could have a Barbra night although I did that last month."

"So what about you? Are you an only child?" she asks, even though he's clearly not based on Carole's use of sons plural. "Your mom is super nice."

"No, I have an older brother," he responds, busy perusing her titles.

She perks up at this. "Oh? How much older?"

"Finn's four years older than me. He's 27," Kurt explains.

"Oh! You and I are the same age!" she announces excitedly after some quick calculations. "My birthday's in December."

"May." He pulls out her copy of _State Fair_. "We're watching this later."

"Ok." Anxious to get back to the topic of Kurt's brother, she sits on the couch. "Do you get along with your brother?"

"He's technically my half brother since we have the same mother but different fathers. His father died in the military when my mom was pregnant with him and she married my dad when Finn was three. So he's basically like a full brother." He pulls a DVD out and examines it for a moment before replacing it. "But yes, we get along well. He's my best friend, even if he does have horrible fashion sense."

"Oh. Well you have a wonderful fashion sense," she offers, admiring his outfit. "I should think it would make up for his lack."

"You'd think but no." He eyes her open bedroom door just off the great room. "I'm starting my Masters in Fashion and Textiles at The Fashion Institute and I can't tell you what an embarrassment it is to have a brother who thinks plaid is the epitome of fashion."

She laughs. "I'm sure it's not that bad."

"You'll probably see him later since my mom's always concerned he's not eating well and inviting him home to eat," Kurt replies, still looking at her bedroom door. "How are the closets in this place? Walk in, I'm assuming?"

She nods happily. "Want to see?"

"Does my brother have horrible fashion sense?" He follows her into the bedroom, sighing happily as he stepped into the closet behind Rachel. "_This_ is the closet I need at home but my dad won't build me one. So for now I have to use Finn's old closet too until I'm done with school and can get my first apartment."

She nods sympathetically. "This is my first place. I just graduated with a theater degree last month."

"We'll have to do this closet justice and go shopping to fill it," he decides, glancing around the half filled closet. "My brother's apartment has good sized closets but he can't be bothered to fill them properly."

She makes a note of that, assuming that means Kurt's older brother is single, or at the very least not living with a girl. "Oh. Well whenever you want to go shopping, I'm ready."

Kurt nods, fingering a dress. "The sooner the better."

Not entirely sure if she's been insulted, she shifts uncomfortably, deciding to change the subject. "Um, want to come into the kitchen with me? I promised your mom I'd bring a salad and dessert."

She's relieved when Kurt nods and follows her, settling on a chair at the island while she moves about preparing the salad and making her dessert. She figures out pretty quickly that Kurt's exactly the kind of friend she needs, since he's as Broadway obsessed as she is and they spend the afternoon in a lively debate about the nominees for the upcoming Tony awards.

Shannon and Wayne stop by for a few minutes to see how Pongo's first day was and she can barely contain her excitement at introducing her two friends to each other. Her excitement grows once Shannon informs her that she spoke to Will and he'd like her to come down to McKinley Academy on Monday for an interview. This in turn excites Kurt since it turns out that not only did he graduate from there, he was a member of the glee club and he immediately begins questioning Shannon about the current status of the club.

Rachel just watches her new friends talk, concentrating on not bouncing in place from excitement as she makes her pie. Her new friend count has doubled in one day and she almost can't wait until pre-school to see who else might be her friend. She kind of thinks the blond guy named Sam might, although both his wife Quinn and their dog Chloe looked bitchy.

Shannon ends up staying to watch _West Side Story_ with them while her pie bakes, Pongo and Wayne eating the celebratory nylabones Shannon had brought at their feet. But it's not until Shannon has left and Rachel's carefully putting her pie in the car that the topic of Kurt's brother comes up again.

"I really should have been an only child," Kurt laments as he settles into the passenger seat of Rachel's convertible Volkswagen Eos, the food carefully arranged on his lap and Pongo strapped safely into his doggie seatbelt behind them. "Walk in closets, an amazing townhouse and now a convertible? Finn's clearly screwed me."

She laughs, checking on Pongo once more while she waits for the garage to open. "It has it's benefits but at least you always had someone to play with. I never did."

"True, even if Finn and his friends did use me as a crash dummy. I can't tell you how many hills I went down first and there was one unfortunate incident with a canoe that I _still_ can't talk about." He shudders as Rachel begins to back the car out of the garage, the roof lowering at the same time. "Although it was quite helpful having a brother who was a legend on the school football team since he made sure the football team protected me after he graduated and I started high school. Make a left out of your development."

She nods, putting on her blinker at his directive. A quick glance in her rear view mirror shows Pongo, his ears flapping in the breeze, happily smelling the air and the sight makes her smile as she drives, Kurt issuing instructions to find his house next to her.

She's happy to see that Kurt only lives about ten minutes away from her but it's her turn to be surprised when she pulls up to a large craftsman style house with a wrap around porch.

"You can park behind my car, the Navigator over there," Kurt decides, pointing to the garage door on the far left, a black SUV in front of it.

An eyebrow immediately arches as she parks behind the Navigator, her eyes registering the shiny pick up truck in front of another garage while a third garage door reveals a Cadillac sedan inside. "Considering your brother screwed you, I'd say you made out pretty well car wise."

"Not really. That Navigator was my dad's." He waits until Rachel's turned the car off before grabbing the food and her bag while Rachel gets Pongo out of his seatbelt. "Let's go inside and put your stuff down then we can sun by the pool and gossip."

"Ok." She follows him through the garage and into a large airy kitchen, her eyes wide.

"Mom? We're here!" Kurt calls out, placing the pie on the large island. "Alan?"

The sound of paws scrambling on the floor above them is immediately heard, followed instantly by a ball of yellow fur bouncing down the kitchen staircase just ahead of Carole.

"Oh there you are! Alan's been waiting," Carole greets, laughing as Alan alters his trajectory away from Kurt and makes a beeline for the struggling Dalmatian in Rachel's arms.

"I can tell." Rachel giggles, placing Pongo on the floor as Alan commences playtime, crouching low to play fight.

"Hey boys! Two legged or four legged, the same rule applies. All rough housing outside," Carole reprimands sternly, opening the French doors and pointing into the large yard. "Alan, take your friend outside."

Alan takes off at a run, Pongo following closely behind which makes Rachel nervous, biting her lip as she watches him go run loose in the yard. "He can't get out of the yard right? He's never been loose outside before."

"It's all fenced in," Carole assures her, closing the door behind them.

"Oh. Ok." Visibly relieved, she turns her attention to the food. "I made an apple pie and a cranberry walnut salad. Where should I put them?"

"Let's just put it them in the fridge," Carole decides, opening the fridge doors and moving the contents inside around to make room.

Rachel grabs the pie and moves next to the fridge, waiting for Carole to give the ok to put it in. The door of the fridge is directly in front of her and she lets eyes roam over the pictures hanging there, smiling at a picture of Kurt dressed in a cap and gown with his parents before another picture catches her eye.

_Whoa_.

It's a picture of a (gorgeous) man and a dog taken on the shore of a lake. The dog is a black Labrador, so it's clearly not Alan but it's the man in the picture that she can't stop staring at. Even though he's bending down next to the dog, she can tell he's tall and she definitely needs to thank whoever decided to take this picture since the man is shirtless and in just his bathing suit. She takes a step closer, admiring his messy brown hair and gorgeous smile. Trying to determine his eye color, she leans forward, just in time to get hit with the door as Carole opens it wider.

"Oh! Rachel I'm so sorry!" she cries, taking the pie from her. "I didn't realize you were right there!"

"It's ok." She flushes, embarrassed and trying to figure out a way to ask about the man. "I was just looking at the pictures."

"That was my graduation from FIT," Kurt explains, pointing to the picture of himself in cap and gown.

"I thought so. Um...does that dog live here too?" She traces the picture lightly, trying to subtly check out the man again. Both Carole and Kurt's faces go sad for a moment, making her slightly uncomfortable and wondering if she did something wrong.

"That's Barney, our old dog," Carole finally replies, her tone sad. "He died two months ago at age 16."

"He was the best," Kurt adds. "_He'd_ never eat my shoes."

"I told you not to leave them where Alan could get them," Carole admonishes, closing the fridge. "Can you go tell your father to start the barbeque? He's down in his workshop."

Kurt nods. "Be right back."

Carole eyes the picture lovingly, waiting until the basement door shuts behind Kurt before she speaks again. "That picture was taken up at Lake George. Barney used to love to swim there. He'd follow my older son Finn into the water and the two of them would be in the water for hours. That's Finn there."

Her eyes go wide at the fact that the incredibly hot man in the picture is Kurt's older brother. The same older brother who'd most likely be making an appearance tonight at the dinner table. She frowns as she glances down at her outfit, suddenly wishing she'd taken Kurt up on his earlier offer to give her a complete makeover while they watched _West Side Story_. Trying to keep her voice casual, she sneaks another look at the picture. "Oh. _That's_ your older son?"

"Mmmhmm." She smiles at Rachel. "That's Finn."

"Oh. Um...so Barney was his dog?" she offers, blushing a little.

"Oh he was everybody's." She leans closer. "Kurt would _kill_ me if he knew I was about to tell you this, but Barney got his name because Kurt just _loved_ Barney the dinosaur when he was little. So when we got the dog, Kurt and Finn were flipping through the channels and arguing about names, it turns out Barney was on and Kurt paused at the show. The dog just started howling when Barney started singing so we named him Barney."

She giggles at that, noting the blur of puppies running past outside before her eyes wander back to the picture. "I won't tell."

"He'd be furious if he knew that I'd only embarrassed him and not Finn, so I'll just say that we also had a pair of birds named Bert and Ernie thanks to Finn. Made my husband Burt crazy." She chuckles at the memory. "He never knew if I was talking to him or the bird."

She giggles again, sneaking another glance at the picture as the basement door opens. "That's adorable."

"Dad says he'll do it in a few minutes," Kurt announces as he comes back into the kitchen. "He's fixing the leg of the chair Alan chewed."

"Ok. I have everything ready for him." She points to a platter loaded with food. "Everything else is done."

There's another picture of Finn on the fridge that she's just noticed, this time sitting in the back of a canoe, an oar in the water while Kurt sits in the front, his own oar across his lap. Finn's smiling at the camera while Kurt looks less thrilled and she's disappointed to see that Finn's got a t-shirt on this time. Kurt's words about Finn making him be a crash dummy in her head, she glanced curiously at Kurt. "Was that at Lake George too?"

"Nope. That was camping in Maine, I think," Carole replies for him. "That was taken just before Finn tipped the canoe and got Kurt to fall out."

Kurt shudders at the memory. "I don't know why I thought it would be different that time."

She giggles at the mental image. "Is that the canoe you can't talk about?"

"Do you _see_ an engine on it?" Kurt snaps. "I told you, we don't talk about that."

"An _engine_?" Carole's face takes on a look of suspicion as she glances between Kurt and the picture. "Do I want to know?"

"What happened with that canoe is between me, Finn and Artie," Kurt replies dryly. "I'm saving it for when I really need something."

"Don't tell me. You both are in one piece so I'm going to live my life not knowing." Carole shakes her head, opening a cabinet.

"Wise move, Mom," Kurt decides. "Let's go get our bathing suits on, Rachel."

"Ok." She grabs her bag off the counter, annoyed that Kurt had come back before she could get any other information about Finn.

"I'll make some Piña Coladas," Carole decides, already reaching for the blender. "It'll be nice on a hot day like today."

She barely has time to thank Carole before Kurt's dragging her to the bathroom to change. Slightly disappointed that she didn't get to change in Finn's old bedroom (and maybe snoop), she quickly changes, slipping outside to join Kurt by the large in-ground pool Alan's currently jumping into while Pongo runs from one end of the pool to the other barking excitedly.

Kurt's already lounging by the pool, a drink in one hand while he flips through a magazine with the other so she heads that way, narrowly avoiding the splash from Alan's latest jump in the pool as she settles on the chair next to him. "Alan likes to swim too, I guess?"

"So does Pongo." He nods towards the pool.

Surprised, Rachel looks up just in time to see Pongo tentatively pushing off from the steps in the shallow end and using short choppy movements as he swims towards a ball floating nearby. She swells with pride for a moment before motherly worries take over. "Do you think he's ok? He's never had swimming lessons. I don't think that's covered in pre-school."

"He's fine." He lifts his legs in an attempt to miss the splash from Alan jumping in nearby. "If he's going to hang out with Alan, he's going to need to learn how to swim."

"But still. He's swimming out into the deep end and he doesn't even have a life jacket on." She bites her lip. "Daddy bought him one just in case, but I didn't think to bring it. Maybe I should run home and get it."

"Rachel, he'll be fine," Kurt assures her. "Charlotte even goes in and if she can, Pongo definitely can."

"Who's Charlotte?" Her eyes follow Pongo nervously as he swims in the pool.

"She's Finn's poodle. She swims all the time, especially if Finn is in the pool," he explains. "She likes to float on the tube since she's so tiny but Finn thinks it's funny to hold her in place and let her think she's swimming since her legs just automatically go."

She laughs, amused by the idea of the hot guy in the picture owning a tiny poodle. "Really? He has a poodle?"

He nods. "Charlotte adopted him when we went to pick up Alan. She wouldn't leave Finn. It's perfect really, since Charlotte bears a strong resemblance to Finn's old bear Mr. Snuggles and my mom says he _loved_ that bear."

"That's funny." She giggles, not blaming Charlotte at all for wanting to go home with Finn. "Isn't he tall?"

"That's what makes it funny. It's hysterical to see Finn holding her..._oh_!" He trails off, sitting up excitedly as his cell phone beeps. "_Finally_."

"What?" She leans back against her lounge and takes a sip of her drink, slightly more relaxed since Pongo's retrieved his ball and is now out of the pool.

"Finn finally texted me back. _Alan_!" Kurt cries, momentarily distracted by the fact that Alan is shaking off next to him.

"Is he going to be late?" Rachel questions casually, turning her head to look at him. "Your dad's already barbequing over there, so I assume dinner will be ready soon."

"No, Mom said he's working overtime tonight," Kurt replies, his fingers flying. "He's finally texted me about his date last night."

"Oh?" She frowns at this, wondering about the specifics of this date and desperately hoping that this didn't mean she'd be adding Finn to her friends list and not her boyfriend list.

"I set him up with Charlotte's groomer since it was so obvious she liked him but Finn actually wasn't sure if she did or not." He rolls his eyes as Alan jumps back in the pool. "_Men_."

"So how'd it go?" Hoping her voice sounds nonchalant, she turns to look at Kurt, whose phone is once again beeping.

"Apparently not well," Kurt replies, scrolling through the text he's just received. "He's mad at me for not telling him that Marley was a pet psychic. Like I'm supposed to know that? It was all I could do to get them to go on the date since he's so oblivious."

"A pet psychic?" She laughs. "Is that a real thing?"

"She says Charlotte and Alan are a message from Barney that he approves of us moving on." He snickers, watching Alan and Pongo swim past.

"Oh." She giggles at this. "So I guess he's not going to see her again?"

"That's what he's asking now. He's debating if he needs to find Charlotte a new groomer." He glances up from his phone. "What do you think?"

"I say yes," she replies immediately, not above manipulation to get what she wants. "Pongo goes to the puppy spa at Groomingdale's, Charlotte can go there if he wants. I have the number in my phone."

"I'll let him know." She watches in satisfaction as he types, already planning a casual meeting at Groomingdale's.

"Pongo doesn't need to get his hair cut but he does enjoy the special puppy bath and massage. Charlotte might like that," she offers, waiting anxiously for Kurt's phone to beep again.

"They have a puppy spa?" he asks with interest.

"Oh yes. I just took Pongo there yesterday to relax before preschool," she enthuses. "His spots are still coming in so it's a very stressful time for him."

"I understand completely." He nods sagely. "Getting a new wardrobe is always a stressful time."

She beams. "I knew you'd agree."

"Do you know if they have an in house designer for their hair accessories?" he presses. "Alan's eaten a lot of my prototypes but I still have a few I could show."

She giggles, her eyes watching Pongo step back into the water again. "Really? He ate them?"

"The dog eats anything," Kurt replies bitterly. "He should really be Finn's dog not Charlotte."

She giggles harder at the mention of Finn, determined to find out more about him. "So Finn eats hair accessories too?"

"Trust me. If they were slathered in barbecue sauce he would." He frowns, noticing Alan coming his way. "Don't even think about it, Alan!"

Alan ignores him, choosing to shake off next to Kurt once more. Rachel laughs, not noticing Pongo preparing to do the same between their chairs.

"Pongo no!" she squeals too late since he's already soaking her and Kurt with his spray, all the while holding onto a ball in his mouth. "Pongo!"

Pongo mistakes her cries as a call for snuggle time, opting to jump up into her lap and easily settling his wet body on Rachel's legs as he plays with his ball. She sighs, giving up and cuddling Pongo to her chest. Not to be left out of snuggle time, Alan climbs on to her chair and puts his paws on her, nosing her face as he kisses her.

"Alan!" Kurt cries. "You're moving in and you don't even know if she's single!"

She giggles as Alan and Pongo jump off her chair and head back to the pool. "Trust me Kurt. I'm as single as they come. Alan's kisses are the most action I've gotten in a while."

"I hear you. My on again off again boyfriend Blaine and I are currently off again." He sat up, his eyes fixated on Alan. "Oh! I think he's gonna do it!"

"Huh? Do what?" she asked in confusion, turning to see what Alan was up to. The Labrador was currently standing on the diving board, his tail down as he took a few steps closer to the edge before opting to sit. "Oh! Isn't that dangerous?"

"Not really. Barney used to jump off it all the time." He shrugs, still staring at Alan serving as Mayor of the pool from on top of the diving board. Pongo appears unimpressed at Alan's new position, swimming past to retrieve a ball. "Alan frequently surfs on the throw rugs when he does laps in the house, riding them down the hall but yet he's afraid to jump off the diving board."

"He's a baby! I'm sure it's scary," Rachel reasons, glad it wasn't Pongo.

"My brother's been trying to teach him but so far he just stands there. Finn will be _so_ pissed if Al does it when he's not here." He frowns, watching Alan back slowly off the diving board. "Oh damn. He got off."

"He'll do it when he's ready. I'm sure he just needs more lessons." She smiles, watching Alan jump into the water from the side of the pool instead and swim after another ball. Pongo's already out of the pool, his ball on the concrete as as he shakes off again. "So how come you and what's his name are on again off again?"

"It's a long story. You want more?" He held up the pitcher enticingly, ignoring Pongo barking at Alan.

"Sure I...oh my God! _Pongo_!" she screeched just as a splash was heard, the result of Pongo's having jumped off the diving board. "Oh my God! He's going to drown, I know it!"

"He's fine. Look, he's already swimming," Kurt assures her. "You know how pissed Finn's gonna be that Pongo did it with no teaching?"

"Well I don't know why you're surprised," she huffs, more than ready to defend Pongo now that he's safely swimming to the steps. "He's a dog of many talents, which makes sense since he's my dog and I'm incredibly talented too."

"Kurt! Rachel! Dinner!" Carole calls out.

Alan, who'd been on his way back to the diving board immediately perks up at the word _dinner_ and takes off at a run towards the house.

Rachel follows, glad she'd packed Pongo's bowl and puppy food. Evidently wet dogs aren't allowed in the house judging by the fact that Carole has moved Alan's bowl outside. Alan's already got his head buried in his food while Pongo dances around him so she places Pongo's special Dalmatian themed placemat and ceramic bowl bearing his name nearby before adding his puppy food. Satisfied that Pongo's taken care of, she takes her own place at the backyard table next to Kurt.

Dinner's a lively affair, punctuated by a few tidbits of information about Finn that she picks up in conversation. While she still doesn't know exactly what went down with the canoe she does find out that the dinner Carole's prepared happens to be Finn's favorite and she files that away under Finn facts.

She's also now in possession of the fact that while the dinner may be his favorite the vegetable accompanying it was _not_, since Kurt doesn't hesitate to inform her that toddler Finn chose to register his protest about the vegetable by throwing them only at Burt. She's already got a clear (and adorable) image of toddler Finn in her head but the scene only becomes more vivid when she discovers that a fed up Burt got his revenge by throwing the vegetables back at Finn and she's soon howling with laughter (the fact that he burst out crying the instant Burt's counterattack hit him? _Super _adorable).

Kurt's decided that musical movie might needs to be accompanied by some ice cream so even though she's full from dinner she lets him bring her to a local ice cream parlor to pick up their movie treat. Their return finds Alan and Pongo, exhausted from their first day of school already curled up together on Alan's dog bed in what she assumes at first is Kurt's bedroom but a quick glance at the sports paraphernalia on the walls tells her it's not.

"This is your bedroom?" she blurts out, hoping her instincts are correct and trying to hide her excitement.

"God no. You think I would ever involve plaid wallpaper, bikini posters and sports stuff in my decor?" He shudders. "I'd be kicked out of FIT. This is Finn's old bedroom. I just use it because a large black TV would ruin the white minimalist look I was going for in my own bedroom."

"Oh." She sits on the bed, her eyes taking everything in. It's a typical boys bedroom but she frowns at the sight of the bikini posters scattered around the room since every girl is blonde. Needing clarification on this, she pastes a casual smile on her face. "Those bikini posters are just awful."

"Oh I know right?" He pops in the DVD and climbs onto the bed. "I tried to get him to invest in some nice artwork but he was only interested in the nudes so I gave up."

"I'm guessing since all the bikini girls are blonde, the pet psychic girl he's dating is blonde too?" she questions, trying to keep that same air of casualness about her.

"No Marley's a brunette." He settles back against the pillows, making himself comfortable as he aims the controller at the TV.

"Oh I see." She mimics Kurt, propping the pillows up as she opens her ice cream, her mind dying to know if the fact that he was dating a brunette was a rarity or if he was an equal opportunity hair color dater. A frown crosses her face at the thought that the brunette Marley might've turned Finn off to brunettes in general.

Alan, clearly having smelled the ice cream, stands on his bed and stretches like a kitty as he yawns. Clearly expecting to partake in the ice cream, he grabs something off the floor and jumps up onto the bed.

"Alan!" Kurt cries as the puppy parks himself in front of Kurt, tail wagging hopefully against the bedspread and a musician's drumstick clamped firmly in his mouth. "Where did you get _that_ one?"

She giggles as Alan drops the drumstick on his lap, clearly expecting ice cream as a trade off. "What do you mean, that one?"

"He keeps finding Finn's old drumsticks. I thought I'd gotten them all but he clearly found more." He shakes his head, hiding the drumstick under his pillow and offering Alan the lid of his ice cream. "I don't even want to know where."

She checks to make sure that Pongo hasn't been shopping in Finn's room as well, but he's sound asleep on his back, paws in the air and drumstick free. "Well maybe Alan is musically inclined. Does he have a favorite song? Pongo and Wayne both do."

"I have no idea. Maybe we should play him _Call me Al_," Kurt replies thoughtfully. "I'm sure Dad has it."

"So I guess since you were in glee club and Finn's a drummer, you're a very musical family?" she guesses, hoping for more info.

"We're not the Von Trapps unfortunately." He sighs, taking a spoonful of ice cream. "Sadly, the only singing Finn will do is in the shower. He absolutely _refused_ to be Friedrich to my Kurt for a costume party one year."

"No!" Rachel gasps. "Who wouldn't want to be a Von Trapp?"

"I know!" He rolls his eyes. "Like the superhero he wanted to be could possibly be better than a beloved musical family."

"I agree." She giggles as Alan finishes licking the lid and jumps off the bed, circling a few times on his own bed before he lays beside Pongo, the movement waking the Dalmatian and making him choose a new sleeping position.

"I'm going to the Sound of Music Sing-along next week with my friend Mercedes. You should come," Kurt continues as the opening credits start to play. "We go every year."

She beams. "Ok."

They're quiet for a while, eating their ice cream and watching _State Fair _while Alan and Pongo snooze nearby. Margy's just accepted Pat's proposal at the very end of the movie when Rachel does her customary puppy check and notices the lack of puppies in the bed. Worried, she sits up. "Kurt, where are the puppies?"

He peers over the edge of the bed. "They're here. I can see their asses sticking out from under the bed."

"Oh." She sits back against the pillows only to sit back up again. "Wait. Why would they be under the bed?"

"I don't know." Kurt frowns and peers over the side of the bed again while she crawls over to the side. Sure enough, there's a white ass with black spots parked next to a toasted almond colored ass just sticking out from under the bed, tails wagging happily. A distinct ripping sound is coming from under the bed, making her worry.

"What are you two doing?" she demands, leaning down fom her side of the bed to peer at the puppies. Two pairs of puppy eyes stare back at her, each chomping on a piece of paper hanging from their mouths while more paper is scattered all around them and the source of all the paper, the remains of a magazine, is between Pongo's paws. She frowns from her upside down position, watching Alan rip off another piece even as she tries to figure out what exactly they're eating. "Uh oh. They ate a magazine, I think."

"I left my Vogue in here. It better not be that!" Kurt cries

"I don't think so. It doesn't look thick enough." She sits back up just as Pongo starts to wiggle out backwards. He emerges from under the bed with the remains of the magazine clamped in his mouth and carries his prize over to Alan's bed where he resumes his ripping of the pages.

Not quite convinced, Kurt stares, watching Alan come out from under the bed with yet another drumstick in his mouth. "_Alan_! Finn will be mad if you eat that!"

"I hope it's not a recent edition," Rachel worries, climbing off the bed to rescue what was left of the magazine.

"It's probably a comic book or a sports magazine, in which case Pongo's doing us a favor by getting rid of the stupidity in those pages," Kurt replies, making a move for the drumstick. Alan ducks his hand, taking his prize over to the far side of the room. "Damn Alan, give me that!"

She laughs, easily plucking the magazine out of Pongo's grasp. "No it's a...oh ew!"

The magazine falls from her hands, only to be reclaimed by Pongo, who grabs it and joins Alan on the far side of the room.

"What? What is it?" Kurt demands, giving up on Alan for a moment.

"They're reading a dirty magazine!" she screeches, marching over to the puppies and grabbing both the drumstick and the magazine. "Pongo can't be reading that! He's just a baby!"

Kurt rolls his eyes. "A dirty magazine? Why am I not surprised?"

"Honestly Kurt. You need to baby proof. I don't want Pongo seeing that stuff till he's older," Rachel chastises, picking Pongo up and cuddling him to her chest. "It's bad enough he sees my lingerie when he watches me do the wash."

Kurt laughs. "I think he'll be ok, Rachel. If anything this is Finn's fault for being a perv. So yell at him not me."

"True." She bites her lip. There's a lot of things she'd like to do to Finn, but yelling's not one of them. Pongo yawns against her chest, snuggling into her as she looks down. "We should probably get going so he can stick to his sleep schedule."

"Ok. What are you doing tomorrow? Want to go shopping for your interview at McKinley?" he asks, stopping the DVD and climbing off the bed.

She nods, following him out of the room with Pongo still in her arms and Alan bouncing around her feet. "Sure. Call me tomorrow?"

"Ok. I'm just going over to my brother's to go through his closet and get rid of his horrendous clothes, but I can go after," he decides, moving down the stairs and gathering her stuff up before he follows her outside.

"Sounds good." She straps a tired Pongo into his seat belt, taking her things from Kurt and placing them in the car before climbing in herself. Giving Kurt a final wave, she carefully backs out the driveway, managing to wait until she stops at a red light before she squeals from excitement at the fact that she made legit friends and gives Pongo a head rub for being so helpful.

Not only did she make legit friends, she's managed to find one with a hot older brother who may or may not be single and like brunettes. The fact that he may also be the owner of dirty magazines is forgotten as she remembers the pictures and just how good he looked in them (of course, he'd look even better if she was in the picture with him).

The light turns green and she takes off, already looking forward to tomorrow and more importantly, puppy pre-school. Because puppy pre-school?

Best. Idea. Ever.

* * *

_**A/N: Now that I've updated this, I'm off to my own puppy pre-school class. :)**_


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